無與倫比的美麗

今天算是不算在最倉促的情況下去聽一個人唱歌, 不太清楚. 其實在這樣偶爾質疑自己的水深火熱之中能在這樣一個夜晚聽到一峰溫暖的歌聲雖然倉促卻還是成為了一個完美的決定, 不只因為一峰, 也莫名地因為一峰的感覺讓我想起的一場concert, 一個人.

短促的上海之旅中有一個安靜的下午, 意外的走進了一個安靜的Concert, 見到了某一個許久沒見的人, 於是, 在那一個安靜的下午安靜的Concert裏我們安靜的依偎在一起聆聽那個似乎我們目前都還同時愛著的女生唱歌, 唱過我最愛的【畢竟】之後, Encore的是那一首有時候不知道自己心情承受不承受得來的【無與倫比的美麗】, 這短短的數小時, 是我們兩個在十個月之後僅有的相聚, 也是我在這之前從未曾預期到的, 畢竟, 曾經我們所有人都以為, 即使所有人都走了, 她都不會離開, 但世界, 就是這樣, 令人無法捉摸.

但, Anyway, 就如同她說的: anywhere in the world, still loving u．．．．．
或者如同我說的: 無論如何 我都很開心 和你曾經同樣的分享過同一种心情 我喜歡有你陪伴的感覺.

因為 你是我 無與倫比的美麗.

Ref. 【無與倫比的美麗】 詞曲: 青峰

天上風箏在天上飛 地上人兒在地上追
妳若擔心你不能飛 你有我的蝴蝶
天上風箏在天上飛 地上人兒在地上追
妳若擔心你不能飛 你有我的草原

耶～耶～ 你形容我是這個世界上無與倫比的美麗
耶～耶～ 我知道你才是這個世界上無與倫比的美麗

天上風箏在天上飛 地上人兒在地上追
妳若擔心你不能飛 你有我的蝴蝶

耶～耶～ 你形容我是這個世界世界上無與倫比的美麗
耶～耶～ 我知道你才是這個世界上無與倫比的美麗
耶～耶～ 我知道當妳需要個夏天我會拼了命努力
耶～耶～ 我知道你會做我的掩護 當我是個逃兵

開始懂了

這一段航程, 是在出發前的一個星期前我還一切都不確定的情況下發生的, 於是以至於在出發的時候都空虛得沒有安全感, 加上嚴重缺乏的書面不熟悉的機場和Airline, 直到開始見到一個個熟悉的面孔, 和每一個充滿回憶的地方, 真實感才重新回到了心中.

在這之前的四個月中, 熟悉我的所有人都說我改變了許多, in all perspectives, 尤其是對某些人的感覺和關注, 要是說對這樣的評語我沒有任何開心地感覺當然也是騙人的, 畢竟對於這一份堅持了七年的堅持我也曾經嘗試就此放棄許多次, 如果真的可以說以後都可以云淡風清的過去當然雖然會有遺憾我的生活一定會更完滿更有自己的風格和感覺, 不需要太多的遷就和放低姿態.

於是這一段航程說實話Half of the reason都應該是自己真地想給自己一個testing, 結果事實證明一切都也還是假象, 在同一個人身上同一個人當年曾經的感覺的時候, 心還是不自覺地淪陷了, 即便頭腦仍舊維持一貫冷靜清醒地分析從他口中說出來的話到底是真心的還是就這樣隨便說說而已畢竟當虛假已經成為他的代名詞的時候, 卻忽然發現已經不重要了, 聽到他的聲音看到他的眼淚就這麼發現自己的感覺完全其實都一直停留在七年前的夏天, 就算現在的他已經不是當年的那個他, 場景人物時間都早已經不復存在了, 感覺卻不自覺地在一直一直一直一直一直的保持新鮮.

所以, 應該就這樣認命了吧, 在這樣的認知之下, 如果還堅持的堅持同時忍受偶爾浮出水面的思念換來短短時間的可愛的假象最後在再一次第一眼的時候就宣告失敗再一次徹底淪陷, 還要繼續堅持的話那我就真的是一個徹頭徹尾的笨蛋, 浪費著自己本來就在浪費大半的時間了吧.

結果, 在這段航程的最後, 再度重感冒的我手提著我自己都知道有多就沒試過自己需要提的這麼重的手提包在就要boarding的10分鐘被臨時通知要換登機口, which is like 1000米的距離之外的東西, to me...

果然, 就當我決定不再想要放棄的時刻, 遠離我四個月的衰運就這樣又回來了...

Something going to be forever

for the past four months, with or without reason, I have to say that I really meant to try my best to forget, ignore someone, and totally tried my best to get the same person out of my life, and my mind, certainly.

actually this kind of thing has happened on me for millions of times, I could even hardly to tell how many times on earth I've tried, and every time again, I failed every time, every time when the minute I see him again.....

not a lover, not a relative, not even a friend, but this kind of mood is unique and special, even I thought I could get rid of it easily, and later I found it extremely difficult and started to try harder and harder, and finally, till last night, I finally know that, no matter how hard I try, or more and more I know about him, his shortages and those characs I hate so much, even the fact that I never know whether he's telling truth or lies when he talks, I could never get rid of him...

this is something which would go to be forever, I think so.
and at the same time, hope God would bless that the other one I am trying to give up would not be forever.

Out of expectation

Actually this trip came at first was totally, out of my expectation, have planned nothing for these four days, 'coz they are just four days, where the hell I can go, I was thinking, and everything just begin from a phone call, and I've got a trip, which i thought was a vacation at the very beginning.

The story begins from Hong Kong, or the way we were heading to Sentosa, I could hardly remember, but suddenly, from the moment we met Bob, our destination changed from Sentosa, to Pulau Redang, the most amazing and most memorable place I've ever seen.

with the first experience of screw diving, the first time being so close to real Coral reefs, and most importantly, the first time knowing how important coral reefs are to our human beings, and what on earth we are doing to the environment.

3 countries in 4 days, another time broke my own record, but definitely one of the most memorable trip I've ever joined, it was so great honor to meet you...